Friday, September 27, 2013

CAPE COUNTY CARNIES ROSTER in the Year of Our Lord, Twenty-Thirteen

Oh, hello. I didn't see you there. What's that you ask? "Is it time for the annual Cape County Carnies Wiffle Ball Club update?" The one you've been waiting for since the last has graced these electronic pages? The answer: Why yes! Yes, it is. The time has come once again, boys and girls. When the great gods of wiffle ball breathe their sweet breath, thick with the odor of pilsner, into Colonel Mutt. It has been many moons, my children, since the 'Mulleted Master' and his gang of talented (and quite handsome) wiffle ballists have descended upon the hollowed grounds of Sherwood Yards. Weep no more! For the wagon train has been spotted in the distance! With The Colonel in the lead, at the ready, waving the feared banner of the Carnies and a razor sharp saber while seated upon his trusty mule, Cyrus. "It is TIME!", the Colonel bellows. Twenty-Thirteen brings several changes to the Carnies' roster. Firstly, and most notably, the roster sees the arrival of one, Big Daddy. You see, Big Daddy and The Colonel go way back. So far back, in fact, that Big Daddy and The Colonel fought side by side in the Great War of the Pony League of the nineteen-eighties. They were many times victorious and hoisted the cup of Champion at its end. So it is with much joy that The Carnies welcome Big Daddy home. Home to his destined place at The Carnies' table. Big Daddy does not arrive without help. Along with our brother-in-wiffle, comes his prodigy and Carnies' rookie, Claws. Not much is known about Claws, but The Colonel trusts Big Daddy's judgement and has agreed to write his name into The Book Carnies lore. He will be tested, surely. This is for certain. Joining the Carnies, is one-time LCDM call-up, Frier. Frier has seen action before. Back when The Colonel was under contract with The Lower Companion Darkside Monkeys, Frier made a one time appearance in the fall of aught-five or aught-six, I do not recall exactly. The Colonel tolerates Frier's company on a daily basis on the circuit, but his obedience and willingness to put himself in harm's way are admirable and the qualities The Colonel looks for in his squad. The last addition, is The Veined One. The Veined One makes his sophomore emergence with The Carnies. The Veined One proved worthy as a Carnie in his tenure with the club two series ago. He returns more veiny than ever to lay waste to short hops and hooks. The Colonel is pleased.

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